Okay, so I’d LOVE to start a garden, even if only a small one and event grow it larger. My problem is - I am the Grimm Reaper of plants.
Not even kidding. I can’t even carry the pot they’re in or they will die.
I have managed, over several years and attempts, to kill not only succulents but also cactus and even a potted Devil’s Ivy plant my mom got me when I was about 5 after having heart surgery. My grandmother kept it until I was in my 20’s and it did amazing. She brings it to me - I kill it.
Help!! What can I do? Where should I start or am I just destined to make plant life cower in fear at my presence?
It may sound weird, but... Change your mindset, or your vibe (or however you call it). Plants are energetically sensitive. That's why you can talk to them and help them grow better. And read about them. Find out what they need. How much water and sunshine they need. A was also bad with plants. Now they are thriving. Or at least are alive.
Try a Rose of Jericho!
They're these amazing, funky little plants that are practically death proof. If they don't get watered, they curl up in a ball and shrivel, but the moment they get water again, they come right back to life in a few hours.
They're used in Hoodoo for love spells, but they're also know for prosperity and good luck!
Fair warning that I just bought the little brown head of leaves that expand when you water it, thinking that I had bought a full plant. It did have roots, and I would water it occasionally, but it quickly got moldy. I did some asking on reddit and apparently those little things that are advertised online are just parts of the whole plant, and aren't going to be "coming back to life". If you buy a Rose of Jericho, make sure you're buying a full on plant that's green.
Hi! You see, plants are very sensitive creatures and if they don't like where we keep them, they'll show it. That being said, you could try again with one or 2 succulents, the easiest are the ones without bright noisy colors, like echeverias, can also try and get ones that older plants that had grown in your area, so they are used to the weather.
Other thing I do with my plant-friends, is nothing too fancy or expensive, sometimes fancy pots have poor draining systems (just one tinny hole), and that's what kills the poor things.
For most of my plants I pour them some water (according to the pot) and don't water them again until the top soil looks dry and if you're not sure, stick a stick into the pot and move around the soil to see if it's still very wet, some like direct sun, others don't so much, I first check by setting them near a light source.
Also talk to them, I tell them "good morning" and "good night" tell them how nice they look, take them tons of pics (also helps me keep track of their growth), and sing them songs, let them know they are loved!
I was emotionally and spiritually sick and stuck these past years, but one day I got a small succulent. It helped me greatly, and I hope your plant friends will do the same for you~
I literally WATCHED a potted plant that was on my window sill— a stable window sill— scootch over to the edge and fall off. I dont' know if it was haunted or if the plant was trying to commit suicide. But, I understand your pain. I kill cactus and succulents too. What I can't seem to kill easily is Philodendron. They grow in low light, need to be watered once a week (I pick Sundays) and if you forget, they'll still survive. And they're really beautiful. And— you can but one and create rootings from the same plant and end up with 10 of them pretty quickly. They're kind of idiot-proof.